1 00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:08,253 Hi, there. 2 00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:10,631 Hey. 3 00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:16,428 You've got a fair amount of blood on you there, sir. 4 00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,306 Oh. Huh. 5 00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:23,393 Yeah, it's not even mine. It was just this... 6 00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:27,523 Never mind. 7 00:02:27,606 --> 00:02:31,068 Hey, listen, I need you to take this thing off my hands, 8 00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:32,945 just make it someone else's problem, you know? 9 00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:36,323 I mean, I thought my boys were gonna love it, but, uh... 10 00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:38,784 Let me tell you, man, they will not. 11 00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:44,039 No, it's not, uh... a toy, 12 00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:47,084 so just don't ever call it that. 13 00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,460 It's a, uh... 14 00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:50,629 It's... 15 00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:54,758 Actually, I don't know exactly what it is. 16 00:02:56,301 --> 00:02:58,554 Besides, it appears to be broken. 17 00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:02,432 See, the drumstick seems to be stuck in the up position. 18 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:06,770 You do not want the goddamn drumstick to come down. 19 00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:08,939 Okay? 20 00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,649 Because when it does, 21 00:03:12,109 --> 00:03:16,613 I promise you, we are all fucked to hell. 22 00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:17,823 Okay? 23 00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:22,661 Woah... Oh... 24 00:03:23,495 --> 00:03:24,621 Okay... 25 00:03:48,979 --> 00:03:51,356 Well, sir, can't speak for you, 26 00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:54,985 but, heh, I don't feel especially fucked to hell. 27 00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:22,888 Hot dog. 28 00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:30,270 Who's smiling now, you infernal son of a whore? 29 00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:44,910 I don't know if every father 30 00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:47,621 passes some secret horror onto his kids. 31 00:04:48,789 --> 00:04:50,374 But mine sure did. 32 00:05:08,016 --> 00:05:10,269 My name is Hal Shelborn. 33 00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:12,771 This is me and my twin brother, Bill. 34 00:05:13,438 --> 00:05:16,275 Well, this is us before everything. 35 00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:19,778 Bill was the kind of kid who would say, "Shake on it," 36 00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:22,489 but then pull his hand back and pretend to slick his hair. 37 00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:25,534 He was older than me by three minutes 38 00:05:25,617 --> 00:05:27,744 and ate most of my mum's placenta. 39 00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:29,997 So that made him my "big" brother. 40 00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:31,665 A role he took seriously. 41 00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:34,293 And he treated me like shit whenever he got the chance. 42 00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:36,169 I've been meaning to tell you... 43 00:05:37,296 --> 00:05:39,256 Mum says she hates you because you made dad leave, 44 00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:40,757 and now she has to go on dates. 45 00:05:42,217 --> 00:05:44,177 But I managed to love him anyway, 46 00:05:44,261 --> 00:05:46,179 even if I did sometimes fantasise 47 00:05:46,263 --> 00:05:47,973 about being an only child. 48 00:05:48,056 --> 00:05:50,642 I hate you, Bill Shelborn. 49 00:05:57,566 --> 00:05:59,484 My mum raised us on her own 50 00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:01,611 for as long as she could, at least. 51 00:06:01,695 --> 00:06:03,196 And my mum, 52 00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:04,906 well, I can remember her perfectly, 53 00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:06,491 like it was yesterday. 54 00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:08,035 Your father... 55 00:06:09,453 --> 00:06:12,956 Well, your father went out for a pack of cigarettes 56 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:14,708 and never came back. 57 00:06:16,460 --> 00:06:19,254 Just made like an egg and... 58 00:06:20,130 --> 00:06:21,131 scrambled. 59 00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:23,216 And sure, sure, 60 00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:25,677 I could have been one of his stewardesses, but, 61 00:06:25,761 --> 00:06:27,888 of course, the deadbeat never took me anywhere. 62 00:06:28,972 --> 00:06:30,182 He just brought back 63 00:06:31,058 --> 00:06:33,852 Swiss cuckoo clocks and bonsai trees. 64 00:06:34,853 --> 00:06:36,188 Knick-knacks and souvenirs 65 00:06:36,271 --> 00:06:37,814 to stuff our closet full. 66 00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:42,652 And one day, my darling boys, 67 00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:44,488 all that horse shit will be yours. 68 00:06:47,282 --> 00:06:49,576 We knew my mum thought it was a bunch of junk. 69 00:06:49,659 --> 00:06:51,495 But for Bill and me, 70 00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:54,706 Dad's closet was full of clues to who he was. 71 00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:56,333 There she is. 72 00:06:58,085 --> 00:06:59,961 Old deadbeat's disguise. 73 00:07:17,813 --> 00:07:19,481 The hell's that thing from? 74 00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,024 Paris, France or something? 75 00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:24,361 It says, "Organ Grinder Monkey." 76 00:07:25,821 --> 00:07:27,322 "Like Life." 77 00:07:28,407 --> 00:07:30,283 You mean "lifelike," dumbshit. 78 00:07:31,410 --> 00:07:32,411 No. 79 00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:39,334 What? 80 00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,346 Give me that thing. 81 00:07:53,014 --> 00:07:54,015 Here. 82 00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:11,241 You think this does junk if I turn this? 83 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,660 Don't, Bill. It's Dad's. 84 00:08:13,743 --> 00:08:16,288 Dad's gone, fuckface. 85 00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:18,039 And I'm his next of "skin," 86 00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:20,959 so legally, everything in here's mine. 87 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,211 Stupid thing's broken anyway. 88 00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:13,595 Don't come in our room, dumbshit. 89 00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:19,935 Shotgun, obviously. 90 00:09:20,519 --> 00:09:22,020 Christ, what's worse than a blind date? 91 00:09:22,103 --> 00:09:23,355 I'd rather take my chances 92 00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:25,357 and kiss a goddamn frog and see what happens. 93 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:26,900 Okay, boys! 94 00:09:26,983 --> 00:09:29,110 Uh, no soda after you brush your teeth, 95 00:09:29,194 --> 00:09:30,737 and no fires, 96 00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,864 and no video games because of the last fire. 97 00:09:32,948 --> 00:09:34,324 I tried to tell them no fires, 98 00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:35,909 but these boys are nothing but willish. 99 00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:37,911 Thank you, babysitter Annie. 100 00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:40,038 I'll be home by midnight. 101 00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:47,379 Okay, boys, 102 00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:48,797 I've got only one rule for tonight. 103 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,715 Keep your hands off the hot parts of the table. 104 00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:51,883 Okay? 105 00:09:51,967 --> 00:09:53,426 I'll try, but... 106 00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:55,220 I'm just a man. 107 00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:58,056 Bill, knock it off. 108 00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:52,754 Holy sh... 109 00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:55,340 Maybe an experience like that 110 00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:56,758 could have brought me and Bill closer. 111 00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,803 But it turned out one freak tragedy 112 00:11:59,886 --> 00:12:01,054 wasn't going to be nearly enough. 113 00:12:02,430 --> 00:12:03,515 Fuck. 114 00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:06,601 How is her head still together? 115 00:12:06,685 --> 00:12:07,769 Sh. Sh. Sh. 116 00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:10,480 Don't think about it too much. 117 00:12:11,523 --> 00:12:12,816 Oh, fuck. 118 00:12:13,692 --> 00:12:15,568 Uuuuhhh... 119 00:12:15,652 --> 00:12:16,695 Oh, yeah. 120 00:12:16,778 --> 00:12:19,489 Today, we are here with Annie Wilkes. 121 00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:23,243 Gone by accident... 122 00:12:24,202 --> 00:12:26,246 rather, in an accident 123 00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:29,124 because, you know, there's no accidents. 124 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:33,086 Um... Is there a divine plan? 125 00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:35,588 Sure, you know, uh, maybe. 126 00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,717 Call it a coin toss, you know, heads or tails, heh. 127 00:12:40,343 --> 00:12:42,137 But not Annie's head 128 00:12:42,220 --> 00:12:46,266 because that is, 129 00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:48,101 uh, separate. 130 00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,520 That's a separate issue. Uh... 131 00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:56,568 Uh... You know, why her, though, right? 132 00:12:56,651 --> 00:12:58,027 Why Annie? 133 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:00,530 Why not you? 134 00:13:02,031 --> 00:13:03,116 Or you? 135 00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:09,247 Everything for a reason, yeah, totally. 136 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:11,583 And it is what it is. 137 00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:15,962 Uuuhhh... 138 00:13:16,045 --> 00:13:18,047 It is what it is. 139 00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:19,382 The word of the Lord. 140 00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:21,009 Amen. 141 00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:24,888 Everything is an accident. 142 00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:27,140 Or nothing is an accident. 143 00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:29,559 Either way, same thing. 144 00:13:30,894 --> 00:13:34,481 It's not if or even how. 145 00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:36,941 It's only when. 146 00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:40,612 Everybody dies. 147 00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:44,240 And that's life. 148 00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:48,328 I'll die. 149 00:13:48,411 --> 00:13:51,873 And you will both die. 150 00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:55,543 And all of your friends and their parents 151 00:13:55,627 --> 00:13:58,546 and all of their pets and everybody. 152 00:14:00,089 --> 00:14:02,342 Some of us peacefully in our sleep. 153 00:14:03,802 --> 00:14:06,930 And some of us horribly... 154 00:14:07,597 --> 00:14:10,475 violently, tied up with a clothesline, 155 00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:13,603 and screaming through duct tape over our mouths 156 00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:15,563 and all that jazz. 157 00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:18,858 And to hell with it. 158 00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:21,402 Come on, let's go dancing. 159 00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:52,016 It might have been on the day of a funeral, 160 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:54,894 but that probably was the happiest day of my life. 161 00:14:56,771 --> 00:14:58,481 It's funny how quickly that can change. 162 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,365 Hey, kid. 163 00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:10,118 Your brother says your dad left your mum. 164 00:15:10,201 --> 00:15:12,579 Lit out to Paris, France to buy cigarettes 165 00:15:12,662 --> 00:15:14,581 'cause you're a big fat baby who cried all the time. 166 00:15:15,373 --> 00:15:18,376 And man, don't your mum deserve better? 167 00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:20,044 I mean, don't she? 168 00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:23,172 - Um... - I guess that means 169 00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:25,425 your mum would be wearing the pants in the house now, huh? 170 00:15:26,551 --> 00:15:28,678 I think that's how it works, yeah. 171 00:15:29,512 --> 00:15:30,847 Aw, but... 172 00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:33,516 see, you're wearing pants. 173 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:36,728 And two people can't be wearing 174 00:15:36,811 --> 00:15:39,022 the pants in the house at the same time. 175 00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:43,818 So, looks like you got yourself a bit of a pants problem, kid. 176 00:15:49,324 --> 00:15:51,284 Honey, I'm making PBandJ. 177 00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:56,748 Oh, and how am I? 178 00:15:56,831 --> 00:16:00,460 Oh, I'm great! I love slaving over my two sons all day long. 179 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:14,515 Mum! 180 00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:15,725 Yeah? 181 00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:19,395 Why'd you put Dad's weird monkey in our room? 182 00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:21,773 You know I don't go in there anymore 183 00:16:21,856 --> 00:16:23,399 since I found that stiff sock. 184 00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:26,736 Oh, yeah. 185 00:17:00,645 --> 00:17:02,188 You didn't have anything to do 186 00:17:02,271 --> 00:17:04,148 with my babysitter's head, right? 187 00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:07,193 - That'd be like... - Yo! 188 00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:10,571 You really got the hots for that thing, huh? 189 00:17:11,406 --> 00:17:13,282 - I... I don't. - It's all good. 190 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:15,410 You can have it, but... 191 00:17:15,493 --> 00:17:17,245 all you gotta do is say you wanna marry it. 192 00:17:17,328 --> 00:17:18,496 But I don't wanna marry it. 193 00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:20,331 Say, "I wanna be Mrs. Stupid Monkey." 194 00:17:20,415 --> 00:17:22,834 I wanna be Mrs. Stupid Monkey. 195 00:17:24,627 --> 00:17:25,753 Now say... 196 00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:28,548 "I wanna suck its banana." 197 00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:31,009 - No, Bill, no. - Say it! 198 00:17:31,092 --> 00:17:33,219 Or I'll eat the rest of your placenta, bitch. 199 00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:36,973 I wanna suck its banana. 200 00:17:38,641 --> 00:17:40,727 All right. We have a deal. 201 00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:42,020 You can have the monkey. 202 00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,816 Idiot. 203 00:17:52,613 --> 00:17:55,324 Between the ages of 12 and 15, 204 00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:57,660 the penis takes on a life of its own 205 00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:59,162 and becomes sensitive 206 00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:02,331 to physical and emotional horseplay. 207 00:18:03,332 --> 00:18:05,168 Around this time, 208 00:18:05,251 --> 00:18:08,421 the opposite sex becomes both appealing and horrifying. 209 00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:17,221 Yo, Mrs. Torrance! 210 00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:19,474 Hal Shelborn's jerking his monkey under his desk! 211 00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:49,420 Honey, I'm making devil's food. 212 00:18:49,504 --> 00:18:51,130 I don't fucking want any! 213 00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,007 Language! 214 00:18:54,592 --> 00:18:57,428 What are you, a sailor in a shipyard? 215 00:19:01,224 --> 00:19:02,308 You. 216 00:19:06,270 --> 00:19:08,606 It's because of you that deadbeat Bill this to me. 217 00:19:11,109 --> 00:19:12,819 You know who I'm talking about, don't you? 218 00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:16,239 That arsehole kid who lives in here with me... 219 00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:18,241 that's Bill. 220 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,327 You wanna know something else? 221 00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:25,081 I wish Bill was dead. 222 00:19:45,643 --> 00:19:46,936 Hey, Mum, you home? 223 00:19:49,564 --> 00:19:50,773 Is dinner ready? 224 00:19:53,401 --> 00:19:54,402 Mum? 225 00:20:12,587 --> 00:20:13,588 Mum? 226 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,300 You're not even making it yet? 227 00:20:43,117 --> 00:20:44,243 What the fuck?! 228 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:50,249 Oh, shit. 229 00:20:59,467 --> 00:21:01,427 The doctors called what happened to my mum 230 00:21:01,510 --> 00:21:03,262 a boomerang aneurysm. 231 00:21:04,013 --> 00:21:06,599 But I was the only one who knew what it really was. 232 00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:10,561 They said chances of it happening 233 00:21:10,645 --> 00:21:12,230 were one in 44 million. 234 00:21:14,148 --> 00:21:16,150 And that's just another way to say 235 00:21:16,234 --> 00:21:17,652 it has to happen to somebody. 236 00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:20,947 And that's how it works. 237 00:21:21,530 --> 00:21:23,950 You turn the key and the drumsticks go up. 238 00:21:24,867 --> 00:21:26,369 They come down again when it chooses 239 00:21:26,452 --> 00:21:27,745 who it wants to kill next. 240 00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:31,457 It kills who it wants when it feels like it. 241 00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:34,126 And it doesn't owe you an explanation. 242 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:37,922 It doesn't take requests. 243 00:21:39,173 --> 00:21:40,883 It's true what it says on the box. 244 00:21:41,425 --> 00:21:43,678 It's just like life. 245 00:21:46,931 --> 00:21:48,432 Uh... son, 246 00:21:48,516 --> 00:21:50,017 - perhaps it's best if you... - Shut up! 247 00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:57,316 Hey, Mum! 248 00:21:59,860 --> 00:22:00,861 Mum, wake up! 249 00:22:04,782 --> 00:22:05,783 Mum? 250 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,246 Mum, that's a funny joke! 251 00:22:19,463 --> 00:22:20,673 Wake up. 252 00:22:34,854 --> 00:22:36,439 Okay, you can keep talking. 253 00:22:43,237 --> 00:22:44,864 Oh... 254 00:22:53,956 --> 00:22:57,251 You know, your Aunt Ida and your Uncle Chip... 255 00:22:58,878 --> 00:22:59,962 never wanted kids. 256 00:23:02,340 --> 00:23:03,341 Nah. 257 00:23:04,550 --> 00:23:07,094 Always just kind of preferred a life where you sit down 258 00:23:07,178 --> 00:23:09,555 and you don't stand up again until you want to. 259 00:23:11,015 --> 00:23:12,641 Also, we're swingers, but... 260 00:23:13,809 --> 00:23:14,810 Oh, well. 261 00:23:27,114 --> 00:23:28,491 And I want you to know 262 00:23:29,867 --> 00:23:31,869 we're gonna do our very best with you boys. 263 00:23:33,954 --> 00:23:36,207 It's just that our very best might be... 264 00:23:37,416 --> 00:23:38,417 pretty bad. 265 00:24:07,488 --> 00:24:09,323 Oh... oh, fuck. 266 00:24:13,577 --> 00:24:14,578 Fuck! 267 00:24:25,589 --> 00:24:26,757 What the fuck? 268 00:24:40,479 --> 00:24:41,480 Fuck. 269 00:24:59,206 --> 00:25:00,958 I put the pieces in a garbage bag 270 00:25:01,041 --> 00:25:02,793 and made sure it got on a garbage truck. 271 00:25:02,877 --> 00:25:05,045 And I assumed that would be the end of it. 272 00:25:06,964 --> 00:25:08,299 But after that, 273 00:25:08,382 --> 00:25:10,009 Bill and I were never the same. 274 00:25:11,010 --> 00:25:13,179 I mean, we looked the same because we were twins, 275 00:25:13,262 --> 00:25:15,598 and, well, you know what I mean. 276 00:25:18,392 --> 00:25:20,561 Aunt Ida and Uncle Chip picked up Bill and me 277 00:25:20,644 --> 00:25:22,104 and moved us to Maine. 278 00:25:22,980 --> 00:25:25,357 And I guess I hoped we'd left the worst of it behind us. 279 00:25:57,515 --> 00:25:59,225 You going to take off your suit, Bill? 280 00:26:01,018 --> 00:26:03,437 If I take it off, then I'll have to put it back on 281 00:26:03,521 --> 00:26:05,356 as soon as there's another funeral. 282 00:26:06,565 --> 00:26:08,067 But if I don't take it off, 283 00:26:08,150 --> 00:26:10,110 then I won't have to put it back on. 284 00:26:10,736 --> 00:26:13,113 So there won't be any more funerals. 285 00:26:21,539 --> 00:26:22,873 Sleep tight, you two. 286 00:26:50,985 --> 00:26:52,528 Here comes trouble, here it comes! 287 00:28:03,599 --> 00:28:04,808 Why the hell did you bring it? 288 00:28:04,892 --> 00:28:06,226 I didn't. I chopped it up. 289 00:28:06,310 --> 00:28:07,811 Don't look chopped up to me. 290 00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:09,605 I'm telling you, Bill, 291 00:28:10,397 --> 00:28:11,732 it's a bad monkey. 292 00:28:11,815 --> 00:28:15,527 It's a bad, magic, killer monkey. 293 00:28:16,737 --> 00:28:18,405 You think it killed Babysitter Annie? 294 00:28:19,615 --> 00:28:22,451 Maybe. Probably. I... I don't know. 295 00:28:25,245 --> 00:28:26,955 I was going to marry that girl. 296 00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:29,333 I know you were, Bill. 297 00:28:31,251 --> 00:28:33,671 We should try it on purpose to see if anyone else we know dies. 298 00:28:33,754 --> 00:28:36,298 No, we shouldn't. I mean, what if it gets one of us? 299 00:28:36,382 --> 00:28:39,134 Then I promise to pretend to be sad when you're dead. 300 00:28:41,303 --> 00:28:43,430 Yeah, me too. 301 00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:48,602 You think it could kill the person who turns the key or not? 302 00:28:48,686 --> 00:28:50,312 How the hell should I know? 303 00:28:56,610 --> 00:28:57,986 Do you think Mum turned it? 304 00:29:04,952 --> 00:29:06,036 I'm gonna try it. 305 00:29:08,163 --> 00:29:09,164 Don't, Bill... 306 00:29:10,958 --> 00:29:14,420 It was a hunting accident, but not the usual kind. 307 00:29:15,587 --> 00:29:19,299 Uncle Chip was trampled by a stampede of 67 wild horses 308 00:29:19,383 --> 00:29:21,260 in his sleeping bag on a camping trip. 309 00:29:22,553 --> 00:29:24,012 I overheard the undertaker say that, 310 00:29:24,096 --> 00:29:25,931 when they dumped the body out, 311 00:29:26,014 --> 00:29:28,517 it looked like someone had drop-kicked a cherry pie. 312 00:29:30,936 --> 00:29:33,147 I don't mind much that Uncle Chip's gone. 313 00:29:33,772 --> 00:29:35,107 He was kind of an arsehole. 314 00:29:35,816 --> 00:29:38,777 I just mind more that I feel pretty good it wasn't me. 315 00:29:39,653 --> 00:29:41,405 But it's got to be done, you know? 316 00:29:42,030 --> 00:29:43,532 To keep it away from the people 317 00:29:43,615 --> 00:29:45,325 who might feel really good about using it, 318 00:29:46,076 --> 00:29:48,412 like the Nazis and Russians 319 00:29:48,495 --> 00:29:50,330 and "Iran-qis" and whatnot. 320 00:29:51,165 --> 00:29:53,083 We knew that it couldn't be destroyed, 321 00:29:53,167 --> 00:29:55,753 so we hoped that we could maybe contain it. 322 00:29:56,378 --> 00:29:57,713 Just get rid of it. 323 00:30:00,174 --> 00:30:02,050 Make it go the fuck away. 324 00:30:07,014 --> 00:30:08,932 And for a long time, anyway, 325 00:30:10,642 --> 00:30:12,394 it really seemed like it had. 326 00:32:48,759 --> 00:32:49,760 Ah! 327 00:33:50,821 --> 00:33:53,407 I haven't seen the monkey since we threw it down the well, 328 00:33:53,991 --> 00:33:57,244 but it feels like only a matter of time before it comes back. 329 00:34:00,038 --> 00:34:01,665 This is me today. 330 00:34:02,541 --> 00:34:04,960 I pretty much lost all contact with Bill, 331 00:34:05,043 --> 00:34:06,128 and I'm good with that. 332 00:34:06,878 --> 00:34:08,422 He was kind of an arsehole anyways. 333 00:34:10,090 --> 00:34:11,216 I don't have any friends, 334 00:34:11,299 --> 00:34:13,593 and I do my best to stay away from family 335 00:34:14,177 --> 00:34:16,221 for fear that if the monkey returns, 336 00:34:16,304 --> 00:34:17,806 it'll kill someone close to me. 337 00:34:19,141 --> 00:34:20,851 But staying away from family, 338 00:34:20,934 --> 00:34:21,935 Excuse me! 339 00:34:22,019 --> 00:34:23,270 that's easier said than done. 340 00:34:23,353 --> 00:34:24,896 Well, fuck your mother! 341 00:34:27,024 --> 00:34:28,108 Hey, Dwayne. 342 00:34:31,319 --> 00:34:33,071 - Oh, man! - Come in, come in. 343 00:34:33,155 --> 00:34:34,406 Oh no, it's cool. 344 00:34:34,489 --> 00:34:36,742 I gotta run early today. I gotta pick up my kid. 345 00:34:37,617 --> 00:34:38,994 Wait, you got a kid? 346 00:34:39,703 --> 00:34:41,371 Shit, man, that sucks. 347 00:34:41,455 --> 00:34:42,664 Does it live with you? 348 00:34:43,749 --> 00:34:45,167 Uh, no, no he doesn't, 349 00:34:45,250 --> 00:34:47,419 but I get to see him once a year, 350 00:34:47,502 --> 00:34:50,088 so I'm taking him to Horror Heaven. 351 00:34:50,172 --> 00:34:51,173 Yeah. 352 00:34:52,090 --> 00:34:53,383 Roller coasters, I guess. 353 00:34:54,051 --> 00:34:55,135 Once a year? 354 00:34:55,844 --> 00:34:57,179 Shit, man, that sucks. 355 00:34:58,221 --> 00:35:02,017 I bet your ex-wife's some type of mega bitch, huh? 356 00:35:02,100 --> 00:35:03,101 Huh? 357 00:35:03,685 --> 00:35:06,813 Oh! No, the once-a-year thing, that was my idea. 358 00:35:07,689 --> 00:35:11,610 It turns out I'm kind of a bad influence, you know. 359 00:35:13,028 --> 00:35:14,988 "Here comes trouble." 360 00:35:15,614 --> 00:35:16,698 Who, you? 361 00:35:16,782 --> 00:35:18,366 It's not like, you know, 362 00:35:18,450 --> 00:35:21,328 I beheld a pale horse, and on it was a pale rider, 363 00:35:21,411 --> 00:35:23,955 and the rider's name was, you know, Death. 364 00:35:25,082 --> 00:35:26,083 But, uh... 365 00:35:28,293 --> 00:35:30,128 Yeah, there has been some death. 366 00:35:33,590 --> 00:35:34,966 Shit, man, that sucks. 367 00:35:46,186 --> 00:35:49,439 Pff! Jet skis, come on. Douchebag. 368 00:35:58,657 --> 00:36:00,867 "Love... Hal." 369 00:36:04,412 --> 00:36:05,413 Fuck. 370 00:36:15,298 --> 00:36:17,259 Feel that parental energy... 371 00:36:17,884 --> 00:36:19,636 transferred from you to me. 372 00:36:30,063 --> 00:36:32,149 Petey's been asking about you more and more, Hal. 373 00:36:33,150 --> 00:36:34,401 And it's breaking our hearts. 374 00:36:37,362 --> 00:36:38,446 About me? 375 00:36:39,156 --> 00:36:40,407 What about me? Why? 376 00:36:41,116 --> 00:36:42,868 Because you're his father. 377 00:36:42,951 --> 00:36:45,120 And he's doing a family tree school project. 378 00:36:45,203 --> 00:36:47,914 And like it or not, you're one of the branches. 379 00:36:47,998 --> 00:36:49,207 Look, I... 380 00:36:49,291 --> 00:36:50,917 I care about Petey. 381 00:36:51,001 --> 00:36:52,752 I do. Like, I... 382 00:36:54,504 --> 00:36:56,882 I care about him a lot, like, a lot, lot. 383 00:36:56,965 --> 00:36:59,426 Just now, when we were on the couch together, 384 00:37:00,510 --> 00:37:01,887 I took your power. 385 00:37:01,970 --> 00:37:04,431 Whoa, whoa, whoa, I never said you could take my power. 386 00:37:04,514 --> 00:37:05,682 It doesn't matter anymore. 387 00:37:06,558 --> 00:37:07,559 Ted has decided 388 00:37:07,642 --> 00:37:09,269 - to legally adopt Petey. - What? 389 00:37:09,352 --> 00:37:10,854 And once the adoption's finalized... 390 00:37:10,937 --> 00:37:14,024 it won't be necessary for you to see Petey at all. 391 00:37:14,107 --> 00:37:15,817 But you can't just do that. 392 00:37:16,359 --> 00:37:17,694 He can't just do that. 393 00:37:18,486 --> 00:37:20,197 As the leading expert in my field, 394 00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:22,240 can't I? 395 00:37:23,116 --> 00:37:25,994 Listen, you and Petey have this time. 396 00:37:26,745 --> 00:37:29,039 So just take the week, 397 00:37:29,122 --> 00:37:31,666 lock in some nice memories, 398 00:37:31,750 --> 00:37:33,210 and then cleanly cut it off. 399 00:37:33,877 --> 00:37:35,295 Like a vestigial tail. 400 00:37:38,673 --> 00:37:40,550 That's what you want. Isn't it? 401 00:37:40,634 --> 00:37:43,220 No. It's not what I want. 402 00:37:43,303 --> 00:37:45,972 I want to spend time with Petey. It's just, you know... 403 00:37:46,598 --> 00:37:48,141 Vestigial? 404 00:37:48,225 --> 00:37:50,018 It means something that has become functionless, 405 00:37:50,101 --> 00:37:51,811 and as a result, is no longer necessary. 406 00:37:51,895 --> 00:37:53,480 - I know what it means, Ted. - I'm sure you do. 407 00:37:53,563 --> 00:37:55,649 - I do. - Well, I have your power, so... 408 00:37:55,732 --> 00:37:58,068 Well, I peed in one of your bushes on the way in, so... 409 00:37:58,151 --> 00:38:00,695 Well, this is the part where I suggest that we arm wrestle. 410 00:38:00,779 --> 00:38:02,530 What? Arm wrestle for what? 411 00:38:02,614 --> 00:38:04,241 For all the marbles. 412 00:38:04,324 --> 00:38:07,077 And by marbles, I am, of course, referring to your little balls. 413 00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:08,536 - My... - Hey. 414 00:38:08,620 --> 00:38:09,746 Honey... 415 00:38:09,829 --> 00:38:11,957 Oh, Petey. Hey. 416 00:38:13,166 --> 00:38:14,167 Hey, buddy. 417 00:38:15,043 --> 00:38:16,378 What are you guys talking about? 418 00:39:28,408 --> 00:39:29,409 What do you mean, 419 00:39:29,492 --> 00:39:31,119 it reminds you of your dad? 420 00:39:33,663 --> 00:39:35,332 You talking about the shit-eating grin 421 00:39:35,415 --> 00:39:38,001 or the hairy back and arms? 422 00:39:41,838 --> 00:39:43,631 Do you ever wonder where he is? 423 00:39:44,924 --> 00:39:46,092 Dad, I mean. 424 00:39:48,303 --> 00:39:50,764 Baby, that ain't worth it. 425 00:39:53,308 --> 00:39:55,060 But if you're really looking for an answer, 426 00:39:55,143 --> 00:39:57,729 I'd have to go with either... 427 00:39:59,689 --> 00:40:02,525 at a card table or under a hooker. 428 00:40:02,609 --> 00:40:04,152 Oh, sick, Ma. Come on. 429 00:40:04,235 --> 00:40:05,236 Gross. 430 00:40:08,782 --> 00:40:10,158 Hey, Beauchamps, honey, 431 00:40:11,451 --> 00:40:12,494 you want a drag? 432 00:40:17,791 --> 00:40:20,543 But are you still thinking of selling that monkey thing 433 00:40:20,627 --> 00:40:22,379 to the nut who never leaves his house? 434 00:40:24,422 --> 00:40:27,217 I mean, have you ever even met this guy face to face? 435 00:40:27,842 --> 00:40:30,637 Sounds like a real fucking pervert to me. 436 00:40:43,358 --> 00:40:46,069 So, do you have any brothers or sisters? 437 00:40:48,405 --> 00:40:49,614 Is that your family tree thing? 438 00:40:50,907 --> 00:40:52,033 What gave it away? 439 00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:55,161 Okay. 440 00:40:57,205 --> 00:40:58,415 So, um... 441 00:40:59,165 --> 00:41:00,792 brothers, sisters? 442 00:41:01,459 --> 00:41:02,502 Yes, no? 443 00:41:03,461 --> 00:41:05,713 Uh... no. 444 00:41:07,549 --> 00:41:08,633 No to both? 445 00:41:09,134 --> 00:41:10,260 Yeah, no, neither. 446 00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:12,720 Only child... just like me. 447 00:41:16,516 --> 00:41:18,643 And, uh, what's your mum's name? 448 00:41:21,646 --> 00:41:22,814 Um... 449 00:41:25,316 --> 00:41:26,317 Lois. 450 00:41:27,777 --> 00:41:29,070 My mum's name was... 451 00:41:30,738 --> 00:41:31,739 Lois. 452 00:41:37,579 --> 00:41:39,080 Hey, uh... Oof. 453 00:41:39,998 --> 00:41:41,624 It's getting kind of late, darn. 454 00:41:41,708 --> 00:41:43,751 I should get you some, uh, some dinner, huh? 455 00:41:44,502 --> 00:41:47,797 Only if you want me to, like, survive. 456 00:41:55,847 --> 00:41:56,848 Cool. 457 00:42:46,648 --> 00:42:49,359 Say it, or I'll eat the rest of your placenta... 458 00:42:49,442 --> 00:42:50,777 I promise to pretend to be sad 459 00:42:50,860 --> 00:42:52,028 when you're dead. 460 00:42:52,111 --> 00:42:53,196 What the fuck?! 461 00:43:07,252 --> 00:43:08,253 Christ. 462 00:43:19,556 --> 00:43:20,848 What the fuck? 463 00:43:50,336 --> 00:43:51,421 Hello. 464 00:43:52,964 --> 00:43:54,340 Well, hello, dumbshit. 465 00:43:59,929 --> 00:44:01,389 Bill. 466 00:44:01,472 --> 00:44:04,017 Can't be the only person who calls you dumbshit. 467 00:44:04,642 --> 00:44:06,644 How did you know how to reach me, Bill? 468 00:44:06,728 --> 00:44:08,688 I haven't heard from you in, what, five years? 469 00:44:08,771 --> 00:44:10,440 Haven't seen you in something like 10? 470 00:44:11,190 --> 00:44:13,776 Nine and eleven, and those are just numbers. 471 00:44:14,485 --> 00:44:15,737 The police gave me yours. 472 00:44:16,362 --> 00:44:17,905 What do you mean, the police? 473 00:44:17,989 --> 00:44:19,198 I have news. 474 00:44:20,283 --> 00:44:22,577 Aunt Ida is no more. 475 00:44:22,660 --> 00:44:23,745 Oh, shit. 476 00:44:24,746 --> 00:44:26,497 Well, I guess she was kind of old. 477 00:44:26,581 --> 00:44:27,915 Was she sick or something? 478 00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:30,710 Actually, it seems the old girl 479 00:44:30,793 --> 00:44:32,754 was having somewhat of a renaissance, 480 00:44:33,379 --> 00:44:36,215 putting her house on the market, cleaning out her closet. 481 00:44:36,883 --> 00:44:38,718 The nice young policewoman I spoke to... 482 00:44:39,636 --> 00:44:42,472 used the phrase, "freak accident." 483 00:44:44,932 --> 00:44:46,434 Okay, and? What? 484 00:44:47,268 --> 00:44:48,936 Someone has to go through her belongings, 485 00:44:49,020 --> 00:44:50,313 and you're the next of kin. 486 00:44:50,396 --> 00:44:52,607 Technically, you're the next of kin, Bill. 487 00:44:53,775 --> 00:44:55,652 This is my week with Petey, so no. 488 00:44:55,735 --> 00:44:57,695 Your week? That's all you get with your son? 489 00:44:58,696 --> 00:45:00,865 - Also, you're weak. - What do you want, Bill? 490 00:45:00,948 --> 00:45:04,452 Go to Aunt Ida's house and make sure "it" isn't there. 491 00:45:04,535 --> 00:45:06,329 "It" is at the bottom of a well. 492 00:45:06,412 --> 00:45:08,748 "It" can teleport and you know it. 493 00:45:08,831 --> 00:45:10,750 Why don't you bring Petey along, hmm? 494 00:45:10,833 --> 00:45:12,877 Let him see you being brave for a change. 495 00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:13,878 Jesus. 496 00:45:14,504 --> 00:45:17,340 What do fathers and their estranged sons 497 00:45:17,423 --> 00:45:18,841 say to each other? 498 00:45:18,925 --> 00:45:20,009 Road trip? 499 00:45:20,093 --> 00:45:21,636 Why would it be at Aunt Ida's anyway? 500 00:45:21,719 --> 00:45:23,096 Because it's attached itself to our family 501 00:45:23,179 --> 00:45:24,305 and likes to kill us. 502 00:45:24,389 --> 00:45:25,848 And I don't want to die, and presumably 503 00:45:25,932 --> 00:45:27,517 you don't want Petey to die either. 504 00:45:27,600 --> 00:45:28,768 And what if I find it, huh? 505 00:45:28,851 --> 00:45:30,228 What am I supposed to do, 506 00:45:30,311 --> 00:45:32,397 drop it from a fucking plane? It'll probably bounce! 507 00:45:32,480 --> 00:45:34,649 No, you never let it out of your sight again, 508 00:45:34,732 --> 00:45:36,067 so no one turns the key. 509 00:45:36,150 --> 00:45:37,527 Presumably you don't want Petey to... 510 00:45:37,610 --> 00:45:39,821 Stop talking about Petey. 511 00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:42,740 The monkey must be vanquished. 512 00:45:43,783 --> 00:45:45,743 Why don't you vanquish it, huh, Bill? 513 00:45:47,537 --> 00:45:48,705 You're smaller, you go. 514 00:45:50,415 --> 00:45:52,041 Bill. Bi... Fuck! 515 00:45:55,128 --> 00:45:57,588 Fuck! 516 00:46:03,761 --> 00:46:05,263 Fuck! What the fuck? 517 00:46:05,346 --> 00:46:06,764 Is that a leg? Fuck! 518 00:46:37,670 --> 00:46:38,796 Okay, okay. 519 00:46:39,380 --> 00:46:40,715 - Petey, wake up. Come on. - What? 520 00:46:40,798 --> 00:46:42,383 - We gotta go. Let's go. - What time is it? 521 00:46:43,217 --> 00:46:44,218 What the fuck? 522 00:46:44,302 --> 00:46:45,303 Hey, language. 523 00:46:45,386 --> 00:46:46,679 And we gotta go, all right? 524 00:46:46,763 --> 00:46:49,640 There was a thing outside. 525 00:46:49,724 --> 00:46:51,142 It wasn't a thing. 526 00:46:51,225 --> 00:46:53,978 It was a woman, and either way, we gotta split. 527 00:46:54,061 --> 00:46:55,354 All right? So come on, let's go. 528 00:46:55,438 --> 00:46:57,148 It's the middle of the night. Are you high? 529 00:46:57,231 --> 00:46:58,357 No, I wish, Jesus Christ. 530 00:46:58,441 --> 00:47:00,610 No, don't do drugs. I mean it. 531 00:47:00,693 --> 00:47:02,195 But come on, let's go. Hurry up. 532 00:47:02,278 --> 00:47:03,362 I'm going to bed. 533 00:47:24,842 --> 00:47:27,678 Hey, Petey, uh... sorry about that. 534 00:47:28,471 --> 00:47:29,972 It's just that my aunt Ida died, 535 00:47:30,056 --> 00:47:32,225 and I gotta deal with a lot of her stuff. 536 00:47:33,309 --> 00:47:34,811 Can I ask you a question? 537 00:47:34,894 --> 00:47:36,229 I'd really rather you didn't. 538 00:47:38,105 --> 00:47:39,190 How'd your mum die? 539 00:47:42,443 --> 00:47:43,986 Is this for your family tree thing? 540 00:47:44,070 --> 00:47:45,822 Because usually family trees are about the whos 541 00:47:45,905 --> 00:47:49,867 and the whens, not the whys and the, you know, how. 542 00:47:51,077 --> 00:47:52,995 Was your aunt the one that raised you after your mum died? 543 00:47:54,747 --> 00:47:58,000 Uh, yeah. 544 00:47:58,668 --> 00:47:59,877 Yeah, yeah, she did. 545 00:48:03,089 --> 00:48:04,298 Maybe you could, uh, 546 00:48:05,174 --> 00:48:06,884 take me to your aunt's house with you. 547 00:48:06,968 --> 00:48:08,469 I could help you with her stuff and... 548 00:48:08,553 --> 00:48:09,887 You're not coming with me, Petey. 549 00:48:09,971 --> 00:48:10,972 Why not? 550 00:48:11,055 --> 00:48:12,849 Because it's depressing, all right? 551 00:48:12,932 --> 00:48:14,559 We were supposed to go to a theme park, 552 00:48:14,642 --> 00:48:16,227 not into, you know... 553 00:48:17,478 --> 00:48:19,230 darkness and death. 554 00:48:19,313 --> 00:48:20,815 I know about the adoption, Hal. 555 00:48:26,529 --> 00:48:27,530 Oh. 556 00:48:28,489 --> 00:48:30,032 And so you can either just... 557 00:48:31,033 --> 00:48:32,994 cut me off and cut this off, 558 00:48:33,995 --> 00:48:35,621 or we can spend 559 00:48:35,705 --> 00:48:38,332 the rest of the little time that we have left together... 560 00:48:40,459 --> 00:48:41,460 together. 561 00:48:46,257 --> 00:48:47,967 I wonder which one Lois would have chosen. 562 00:49:01,731 --> 00:49:03,983 What are you doing in here all alone, Hal? 563 00:49:04,859 --> 00:49:06,360 Or do I not want to know? 564 00:49:07,486 --> 00:49:08,905 Just thinking, I guess. 565 00:49:08,988 --> 00:49:09,989 Oh, yeah? 566 00:49:11,115 --> 00:49:13,159 - About what? - I don't know. 567 00:49:13,784 --> 00:49:14,785 The future. 568 00:49:16,579 --> 00:49:17,830 You got any advice? 569 00:49:18,706 --> 00:49:21,834 Um, well... 570 00:49:23,002 --> 00:49:24,211 take care of your teeth. 571 00:49:26,047 --> 00:49:27,840 And take care of your gut. 572 00:49:28,633 --> 00:49:30,176 And take life as it comes. 573 00:49:30,259 --> 00:49:32,803 You know, the worst thing you can do is try to force it. 574 00:49:33,679 --> 00:49:37,224 But really, I think that the most important thing 575 00:49:37,308 --> 00:49:39,518 for you to remember is... 576 00:49:42,021 --> 00:49:44,231 try not to kill everybody around you. 577 00:49:56,535 --> 00:49:57,536 Petey? Pe... 578 00:50:01,248 --> 00:50:02,249 Petey? 579 00:50:06,420 --> 00:50:07,421 Petey? 580 00:50:09,173 --> 00:50:10,591 Hey, Petey, buddy? 581 00:50:12,718 --> 00:50:14,011 Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 582 00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:15,888 Fuck, fuck, fuck. 583 00:50:32,113 --> 00:50:33,990 Check it out. There's a place in town. 584 00:50:34,073 --> 00:50:35,324 They do skydiving lessons. 585 00:50:35,408 --> 00:50:36,742 I feel like it's one of those things 586 00:50:36,826 --> 00:50:38,869 where you're either really good at it or you aren't. 587 00:50:38,953 --> 00:50:40,329 It only takes one lesson to find out. 588 00:50:41,914 --> 00:50:42,915 Hey, funny. 589 00:50:42,999 --> 00:50:45,084 That's... that's funny. 590 00:50:45,835 --> 00:50:48,462 Yeah? Well, you're kind of funny too, Hal. 591 00:50:49,505 --> 00:50:51,882 Oh, and they do weddings. 592 00:51:06,022 --> 00:51:08,274 Hey, uh, do me a favour, all right? 593 00:51:08,357 --> 00:51:10,651 Uh, wait in the car while I deal with this. 594 00:51:11,193 --> 00:51:12,737 What? No way. 595 00:51:12,820 --> 00:51:14,655 I want to see your old room like they do in the movies. 596 00:51:14,739 --> 00:51:15,781 No, Petey. 597 00:51:15,865 --> 00:51:16,949 Why not? 598 00:51:17,033 --> 00:51:19,618 Just because... because I said so. 599 00:51:20,244 --> 00:51:21,829 All right. Fine. 600 00:51:22,788 --> 00:51:24,457 Then I have to go number two. 601 00:51:25,416 --> 00:51:27,334 What? Why didn't you go at the motel? 602 00:51:27,418 --> 00:51:29,503 There's a lot you don't know about me, Hal. 603 00:51:29,587 --> 00:51:31,005 For instance, 604 00:51:31,088 --> 00:51:33,966 I'm one of those kids that can only go poo in a house. 605 00:51:34,050 --> 00:51:35,968 Are you being serious? 606 00:51:38,054 --> 00:51:39,680 It's a tough bet to lose, Hal. 607 00:51:42,266 --> 00:51:43,601 Jesus Christ. 608 00:51:43,684 --> 00:51:44,852 Hi. 609 00:51:44,935 --> 00:51:47,396 Hey there. Sorry. Ah. 610 00:51:47,480 --> 00:51:48,981 Oh, window won't go down. 611 00:51:49,065 --> 00:51:50,483 - Yeah, okay. - Hey there. 612 00:51:50,566 --> 00:51:52,568 - How are you? - Hi! I'm Barbara. 613 00:51:52,651 --> 00:51:54,695 - Hi. - You must be Hal Shelborn. 614 00:51:54,779 --> 00:51:57,031 Your brother Bill Shelborn said you'd be coming. 615 00:51:57,114 --> 00:51:58,699 Oh, yeah, right, right. 616 00:51:58,783 --> 00:51:59,992 Uh, hi, Barbara. Yeah. 617 00:52:00,076 --> 00:52:01,410 That brother Bill of yours 618 00:52:01,494 --> 00:52:03,329 is quite the character, isn't he? 619 00:52:03,412 --> 00:52:05,247 - Yeah. - Your brother Bill, I mean! 620 00:52:05,331 --> 00:52:07,792 Yes, yes. He's quite the character. Yeah. 621 00:52:07,875 --> 00:52:10,127 Yeah. Wow, who's this little slugger? 622 00:52:10,211 --> 00:52:12,171 Oh, this is, uh, this is my son, Petey. 623 00:52:12,254 --> 00:52:14,298 Oh, hello there. 624 00:52:14,381 --> 00:52:15,549 Oh, no, thanks, Barbara. 625 00:52:15,633 --> 00:52:18,344 I'm just a kid who doesn't buy many houses. 626 00:52:18,427 --> 00:52:20,721 But I also didn't know that I have an uncle. 627 00:52:20,805 --> 00:52:22,848 So, yeah, thanks for that. 628 00:52:22,932 --> 00:52:25,309 Um, it's funny, because I actually asked Hal here 629 00:52:25,392 --> 00:52:27,019 if he had any siblings yesterday. 630 00:52:27,103 --> 00:52:28,813 But he flat out lied to my face. 631 00:52:28,896 --> 00:52:30,272 - Well... - But it's cool. 632 00:52:30,356 --> 00:52:32,316 He's only going to be my dad for, like, 633 00:52:32,399 --> 00:52:33,776 a few more days anyway, 634 00:52:33,859 --> 00:52:36,612 'cause he's being swapped out for a leading expert. 635 00:52:38,197 --> 00:52:39,615 - Yeah. - Okay. 636 00:52:41,534 --> 00:52:43,202 - Well... - So no card. Okay. 637 00:52:43,285 --> 00:52:44,578 - No card, yeah. - Let's see the house. 638 00:52:46,997 --> 00:52:48,624 Were you and your aunt very close? 639 00:52:48,707 --> 00:52:49,959 Uh, sure. Very. 640 00:52:50,042 --> 00:52:51,460 Is this all her stuff? 641 00:52:51,544 --> 00:52:53,295 I felt like she had more stuff. 642 00:52:53,379 --> 00:52:55,506 Oh, well, we did have that estate sale 643 00:52:55,589 --> 00:52:57,258 the day after she died. 644 00:52:57,341 --> 00:52:59,260 We had a great turnout, too. 645 00:52:59,343 --> 00:53:01,595 We must have made over $100, ha! 646 00:53:01,679 --> 00:53:02,763 Right... 647 00:53:02,847 --> 00:53:03,848 Okay. 648 00:53:04,932 --> 00:53:08,227 Now, let's see, that would have been on Sunday, 649 00:53:08,310 --> 00:53:09,979 because ever since Monday, 650 00:53:10,062 --> 00:53:13,732 things have been a bit, uh, messy around here. 651 00:53:13,816 --> 00:53:16,152 Yeah. Your aunt, of course, was Monday. 652 00:53:17,611 --> 00:53:18,988 And then, oh Lord, 653 00:53:19,071 --> 00:53:20,906 first thing Tuesday, it was Mitch McDonald. 654 00:53:28,372 --> 00:53:31,208 And then Wednesday was Burt Burgerson. 655 00:53:37,214 --> 00:53:38,966 And then Nancy Risoli. 656 00:53:46,056 --> 00:53:49,226 But there aren't any cobras in Maine, I mean, are there? 657 00:53:50,936 --> 00:53:52,688 Well, there was the one. 658 00:53:54,857 --> 00:53:56,233 No, every day since Monday, 659 00:53:56,317 --> 00:53:59,153 at least one Casco local has just... poof! 660 00:54:00,029 --> 00:54:03,324 Sometimes two or three or four 661 00:54:03,407 --> 00:54:06,952 or even five Casco locals have just poof... 662 00:54:07,036 --> 00:54:08,787 - Right. OK. - And poof and poof! 663 00:54:08,871 --> 00:54:10,956 Great, yeah, yeah, no, I get it. 664 00:54:11,040 --> 00:54:13,709 Could we look at the other closet? It's this way, I think. 665 00:54:14,627 --> 00:54:16,378 Absolutely, follow me. 666 00:54:16,462 --> 00:54:17,463 Poof! 667 00:54:31,185 --> 00:54:33,103 You're fucking twins? 668 00:54:34,521 --> 00:54:36,523 You know, my mother used to always say 669 00:54:36,607 --> 00:54:38,442 whenever there was a plane crash 670 00:54:38,525 --> 00:54:40,736 or a school bus going off into the river 671 00:54:40,819 --> 00:54:43,405 and mass fatalities or what have you... 672 00:54:43,489 --> 00:54:44,907 She used to always say, 673 00:54:44,990 --> 00:54:47,785 "Looks like God's bowling strikes tonight." 674 00:54:52,206 --> 00:54:53,249 Oh, that's odd. 675 00:54:53,332 --> 00:54:54,959 I don't remember locking this. 676 00:54:55,042 --> 00:54:56,460 Hey, you wouldn't happen to remember 677 00:54:56,543 --> 00:55:01,006 if my aunt had a wind-up toy monkey at the yard sale? 678 00:55:01,090 --> 00:55:03,425 Oh, no, I don't think so. 679 00:55:03,968 --> 00:55:07,805 Oh, not a cherished childhood memory, now, was it? 680 00:55:07,888 --> 00:55:10,516 Oh, a first little furry friend 681 00:55:10,599 --> 00:55:12,268 filled with whimsy and wonder? 682 00:55:12,351 --> 00:55:14,645 No, it's no big deal. Thanks. 683 00:55:14,728 --> 00:55:16,063 Okay. 684 00:55:19,024 --> 00:55:21,860 Nope, not that one. 685 00:55:23,570 --> 00:55:25,531 How are we doing with that key? 686 00:55:25,614 --> 00:55:29,034 Oh... Don't you worry your pretty little head. 687 00:55:29,118 --> 00:55:31,495 Oh mercy, did I say that out loud? 688 00:55:32,830 --> 00:55:33,872 Watch out! 689 00:55:34,873 --> 00:55:36,292 You are pretty, though. 690 00:55:52,099 --> 00:55:53,434 - Oh! - You know what? 691 00:55:53,517 --> 00:55:54,727 - I think we should go down... - It looks like I did 692 00:55:54,810 --> 00:55:57,146 my own little process of elimination! 693 00:55:59,064 --> 00:56:00,607 No, no, no! 694 00:56:11,535 --> 00:56:12,870 Everything okay up there? 695 00:56:19,960 --> 00:56:21,670 Yeah, everything's fine. 696 00:56:30,137 --> 00:56:31,430 Oh, fuck. 697 00:56:44,068 --> 00:56:45,778 And you were just standing there, 698 00:56:45,861 --> 00:56:47,154 hands to yourself, is that right? 699 00:56:47,237 --> 00:56:48,822 Yeah, that's right. 700 00:56:48,906 --> 00:56:51,325 And you knew there was a gun in the house, or not so much? 701 00:56:51,408 --> 00:56:52,576 Uh, no. 702 00:56:54,870 --> 00:56:55,913 Okay. 703 00:56:56,455 --> 00:56:58,040 I'm gonna have to ask you don't leave town 704 00:56:58,123 --> 00:56:59,583 until we can figure a few things out. 705 00:56:59,666 --> 00:57:00,918 What? No, no, no, officer. 706 00:57:01,001 --> 00:57:02,419 I promised my son that I was gonna take him 707 00:57:02,503 --> 00:57:04,171 - to Horror Heaven. - Actually, officer, 708 00:57:04,254 --> 00:57:06,382 we moved off going to Horror Heaven. 709 00:57:06,465 --> 00:57:08,008 This is obviously far more important. 710 00:57:08,634 --> 00:57:10,052 - Smart kid. - Hmm. 711 00:57:10,719 --> 00:57:12,054 Find a motel. 712 00:57:12,137 --> 00:57:15,432 I'd say stay here, but it's a goddamn mess in there. 713 00:57:15,516 --> 00:57:17,434 I mean, have you actually been up there? 714 00:57:17,518 --> 00:57:18,769 It's like that restaurant... 715 00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:20,604 Spaghetti City. 716 00:57:23,982 --> 00:57:26,360 Hey, bud, you wanna go wait in the car? 717 00:57:26,443 --> 00:57:30,197 Yeah, that's your favourite thing for me to do anyway, isn't it? 718 00:57:30,906 --> 00:57:32,032 Just stay away. 719 00:57:34,535 --> 00:57:36,203 They're bringing the body out! 720 00:57:43,585 --> 00:57:48,757 Let's go, Casco! Let's go, Casco! Let's go! 721 00:58:16,243 --> 00:58:17,578 Hello? 722 00:58:17,661 --> 00:58:20,414 Hal Shelborn, please, if he's available. 723 00:58:20,497 --> 00:58:22,291 - Bill? - Thank goodness. 724 00:58:22,374 --> 00:58:25,043 And Petey? Is he available, too? 725 00:58:25,127 --> 00:58:27,045 Yeah, look, we're fine, but, um... 726 00:58:27,963 --> 00:58:29,381 The monkey's not here. 727 00:58:29,465 --> 00:58:31,675 Aunt Ida had a goddamn yard sale, so it could've been, 728 00:58:31,758 --> 00:58:33,844 but now it could be anywhere with anyone. 729 00:58:33,927 --> 00:58:36,221 Well, that's not good. That's bad. 730 00:58:36,305 --> 00:58:38,307 Yeah, there's all kinds of shit happening in town, 731 00:58:38,390 --> 00:58:40,267 people dying in not normal ways. 732 00:58:41,018 --> 00:58:42,644 Police told me I can't leave. 733 00:58:42,728 --> 00:58:44,605 Go to the motel. Await my signal. 734 00:58:44,688 --> 00:58:46,356 Await your fucking signal?! 735 00:58:49,193 --> 00:58:50,486 Wait, Bill, where are you? 736 00:58:51,987 --> 00:58:53,614 Bill, are you living in town? 737 00:59:10,672 --> 00:59:11,673 Stupid. 738 00:59:18,680 --> 00:59:22,017 Shelborn, Shelborn... Argh. Nope. 739 00:59:36,198 --> 00:59:37,574 "Mrs. Monkey"? 740 00:59:46,542 --> 00:59:47,543 Hello. 741 00:59:47,626 --> 00:59:49,670 If this is in regards to my ad, 742 00:59:49,753 --> 00:59:51,255 I'm happy to report that my quest 743 00:59:51,338 --> 00:59:54,258 for finding my beloved toy monkey is over. 744 00:59:54,800 --> 00:59:57,261 Thank you for calling and be safe out there. 745 01:00:32,588 --> 01:00:35,340 At the very moment you slipped from my fingers, 746 01:00:36,925 --> 01:00:39,803 I suddenly knew the terrible truth about everything. 747 01:00:41,263 --> 01:00:42,681 That my dumbshit brother 748 01:00:42,764 --> 01:00:44,725 had turned your key and killed my mum. 749 01:00:54,067 --> 01:00:56,695 So I went back to get you as soon as I could. 750 01:00:58,447 --> 01:00:59,948 But you were gone. 751 01:01:01,074 --> 01:01:04,494 Leaving behind a sign for me and only me. 752 01:01:05,245 --> 01:01:07,623 That one day, you'd be back. 753 01:01:09,499 --> 01:01:11,001 And so I waited. 754 01:01:13,795 --> 01:01:15,797 And for the longest time, 755 01:01:16,757 --> 01:01:18,300 there was nothing. 756 01:01:20,761 --> 01:01:24,306 A hundred percent, pure, medical-grade nothingness. 757 01:01:31,355 --> 01:01:32,397 But then... 758 01:01:38,195 --> 01:01:39,863 there you were. 759 01:01:59,174 --> 01:02:03,011 Suddenly, everywhere I looked, you were there. 760 01:02:03,095 --> 01:02:04,888 Oh, fuck! 761 01:02:05,972 --> 01:02:10,310 As constant as the sun, the moon, and the stars. 762 01:02:10,977 --> 01:02:13,188 As if you had always been looking down on me. 763 01:02:15,148 --> 01:02:18,568 Letting me know what I had always wanted to be true. 764 01:02:20,070 --> 01:02:23,073 That you'd come back to help me seek my revenge. 765 01:02:27,619 --> 01:02:29,955 I returned to the places where I thought you might be. 766 01:02:30,580 --> 01:02:34,084 Foolishly believing that I could make you appear again. 767 01:02:34,167 --> 01:02:35,419 Fuck. 768 01:02:35,502 --> 01:02:37,921 That it was I who might find you again. 769 01:02:41,174 --> 01:02:43,552 So I made myself ready for your return. 770 01:02:47,264 --> 01:02:49,891 Reworking my old childhood funeral suit 771 01:02:49,975 --> 01:02:51,518 in anticipation of... 772 01:02:52,728 --> 01:02:54,020 more funerals. 773 01:02:55,355 --> 01:02:57,274 And so that I might once again 774 01:02:57,357 --> 01:02:59,985 bear witness to your terrible glory. 775 01:03:00,068 --> 01:03:01,278 Fuck! 776 01:03:03,905 --> 01:03:07,784 So I looked, and behold, a pale horse, 777 01:03:08,785 --> 01:03:11,747 and his name that sat on him was Death. 778 01:03:11,830 --> 01:03:13,540 Mrs. Monkey. 779 01:03:15,167 --> 01:03:16,668 And now, here we are. 780 01:03:17,627 --> 01:03:18,879 Together at last. 781 01:03:20,046 --> 01:03:23,300 With only one thing left to do. 782 01:03:26,386 --> 01:03:27,846 In your infinite wisdom, 783 01:03:29,264 --> 01:03:31,892 I trust your flaming sword of righteousness 784 01:03:33,226 --> 01:03:34,978 will cut the foul air 785 01:03:36,062 --> 01:03:38,482 and smite the right person. 786 01:03:39,733 --> 01:03:42,652 And I know you know exactly who I'm talking about. 787 01:03:59,419 --> 01:04:01,087 Shit, man, that sucks. 788 01:04:07,135 --> 01:04:08,762 Shit, man, that sucks! Ah! 789 01:04:13,517 --> 01:04:14,601 What? 790 01:04:14,684 --> 01:04:16,978 Um, uh, it's Ricky. 791 01:04:17,062 --> 01:04:18,772 What is it? I'm extremely busy. 792 01:04:18,855 --> 01:04:20,690 Okay, yeah, so... 793 01:04:20,774 --> 01:04:23,193 I hope this isn't weird, but I was wondering, 794 01:04:23,276 --> 01:04:25,862 you know, if maybe I could give you your 15 bucks back 795 01:04:25,946 --> 01:04:27,948 and instead I could just keep the toy monkey thing. 796 01:04:28,031 --> 01:04:30,325 It's not a toy, don't ever call it that. 797 01:04:30,408 --> 01:04:33,161 Right, yeah, no, I thought the same thing too. 798 01:04:33,245 --> 01:04:35,330 It just sort of makes me think about my dad, 799 01:04:35,413 --> 01:04:36,915 which I know is kind of a weird thing 800 01:04:36,998 --> 01:04:39,167 for, like, a guy to say, like, to another guy. 801 01:04:44,172 --> 01:04:47,342 Does it hurt very much when you think, Ricky? 802 01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:53,223 - Well... - "Uh... Well, well..." 803 01:04:53,932 --> 01:04:58,436 Did you know that 27% of all English-speaking people 804 01:04:58,520 --> 01:05:02,482 will either say, "oh, shit" or "holy shit" before they die? 805 01:05:03,358 --> 01:05:04,693 Now it's funny, because death 806 01:05:04,776 --> 01:05:07,153 is the one big thing that'll happen to all of us, 807 01:05:07,237 --> 01:05:12,200 and yet we still can't help but be somehow surprised by it. 808 01:05:15,453 --> 01:05:16,872 Right on, man. 809 01:05:18,456 --> 01:05:19,457 So anyway, 810 01:05:19,541 --> 01:05:21,418 I saw your brother. 811 01:05:21,501 --> 01:05:22,961 He looks like you. 812 01:05:23,545 --> 01:05:25,046 With that's, like, uh... 813 01:05:25,755 --> 01:05:27,048 that's, like, your nephew then, huh? 814 01:05:32,012 --> 01:05:34,556 What if Petey turned the key? 815 01:05:36,808 --> 01:05:38,810 So... so, can I have it back? 816 01:05:39,394 --> 01:05:41,646 Never. I employed you to find the monkey, 817 01:05:41,730 --> 01:05:43,231 not to fall in love with it. 818 01:05:43,315 --> 01:05:44,399 Now fuck off. 819 01:05:50,947 --> 01:05:52,115 Fuck you... 820 01:06:01,416 --> 01:06:04,085 Hey, Ma, are you home or are you at the factory? 821 01:06:14,512 --> 01:06:15,597 Lousy deadbeat. 822 01:06:25,774 --> 01:06:26,942 Yo, Beauchamps! 823 01:06:27,025 --> 01:06:28,818 You got any extra bullets? 824 01:06:31,321 --> 01:06:32,364 What calibre? 825 01:06:39,996 --> 01:06:42,165 Hey, you still got some of Barbara's blood on you. 826 01:06:45,043 --> 01:06:46,044 Yeah. 827 01:06:48,588 --> 01:06:50,006 Accidents happen. 828 01:06:53,593 --> 01:06:54,886 Can I ask you a question? 829 01:06:55,929 --> 01:06:57,180 Ha ha. 830 01:06:57,263 --> 01:06:58,431 Uh, nope. 831 01:07:02,560 --> 01:07:03,561 You ever killed a man? 832 01:07:05,522 --> 01:07:07,399 I... 833 01:07:11,277 --> 01:07:12,278 Jesus. 834 01:07:13,446 --> 01:07:14,447 Does Mum know? 835 01:07:14,531 --> 01:07:17,033 No, I haven't killed anybody. 836 01:07:17,117 --> 01:07:19,202 Of course I haven't killed anybody. 837 01:07:20,912 --> 01:07:23,373 Look, when we get back to the motel, I'm gonna call your mum 838 01:07:23,456 --> 01:07:25,500 and I'm gonna tell her what happened. 839 01:07:26,334 --> 01:07:29,087 She'll think I'm not safe to be around and... 840 01:07:29,838 --> 01:07:31,047 she'll be right. 841 01:07:31,881 --> 01:07:33,466 So Ted will just adopt me and... 842 01:07:34,050 --> 01:07:35,552 you'll never have to see me again? 843 01:07:38,263 --> 01:07:40,140 You're better off with Ted, all right? 844 01:07:46,021 --> 01:07:47,147 Fuck you, man. 845 01:07:55,697 --> 01:07:56,823 Hey, Petey... 846 01:08:01,119 --> 01:08:02,746 Well, I'm here if you need me. 847 01:08:06,207 --> 01:08:08,376 You just do your thing in the bathroom, okay? 848 01:08:09,044 --> 01:08:11,129 And if you wanna have a talk, 849 01:08:11,212 --> 01:08:13,173 we can have a proper talk, all right, buddy? 850 01:08:24,934 --> 01:08:26,102 Yes? 851 01:08:26,186 --> 01:08:28,396 It's me. You have it, don't you? 852 01:08:28,480 --> 01:08:29,689 I don't know, maybe. 853 01:08:29,773 --> 01:08:31,274 Come on, Bill, Mrs. Monkey? 854 01:08:31,357 --> 01:08:32,776 I know you are, but what am I? 855 01:08:32,859 --> 01:08:34,319 Stop turning the key! 856 01:08:34,402 --> 01:08:37,363 Its arms aren't fucking long enough or articulate enough 857 01:08:37,447 --> 01:08:39,866 to reach back there itself, so somebody has to. 858 01:08:41,576 --> 01:08:42,577 And also, no. 859 01:08:42,660 --> 01:08:44,788 Jesus fucking Christ, Bill, 860 01:08:44,871 --> 01:08:46,289 these are innocent people. 861 01:08:46,372 --> 01:08:49,000 Look, I... I don't care about me. 862 01:08:49,542 --> 01:08:52,670 All that matters is that Petey is safe, so stop turning it. 863 01:08:52,754 --> 01:08:54,380 If you want me to stop turning the key, 864 01:08:54,464 --> 01:08:56,549 bring Petey to me so he can turn it instead. 865 01:08:56,633 --> 01:08:58,384 What? No. Why? 866 01:08:58,468 --> 01:09:00,637 The person who turns the key never dies. 867 01:09:01,471 --> 01:09:03,556 You've known that since we were kids, haven't you, Hal? 868 01:09:03,640 --> 01:09:04,641 What? 869 01:09:05,308 --> 01:09:06,559 What are you talking about? 870 01:09:08,228 --> 01:09:09,479 Where are you, Bill? 871 01:09:09,562 --> 01:09:10,980 If you want Petey to be safe, 872 01:09:11,064 --> 01:09:13,566 all Petey has to do is turn the key 873 01:09:13,650 --> 01:09:17,695 and keep turning the key forever and ever and ever, 874 01:09:17,779 --> 01:09:19,781 and Petey will never die. 875 01:09:19,864 --> 01:09:21,616 Listen to me, Bill, all right? 876 01:09:21,699 --> 01:09:24,035 Let me get Petey out of here, then we'll talk, all right? 877 01:09:24,119 --> 01:09:26,037 We'll figure out what we're gonna do. 878 01:09:26,121 --> 01:09:28,998 Either I keep turning the key or Petey turns the key. 879 01:09:29,916 --> 01:09:31,918 Call me back when you made your decision. 880 01:09:32,001 --> 01:09:33,336 Wait, wait, wait, wait! 881 01:09:33,419 --> 01:09:34,546 Bill, Bi... 882 01:09:34,629 --> 01:09:35,755 Fuck! 883 01:09:42,595 --> 01:09:44,180 Hey, Petey? Petey? 884 01:09:46,432 --> 01:09:47,433 Hey, Petey? 885 01:09:48,059 --> 01:09:49,727 Hey, buddy, we gotta go, all right? 886 01:09:50,353 --> 01:09:51,771 I gotta take you back to your mum's. 887 01:09:53,481 --> 01:09:54,858 Petey, open the door! Come on! 888 01:09:57,443 --> 01:09:58,444 Petey! 889 01:09:59,863 --> 01:10:01,156 Petey, open the door! 890 01:10:02,574 --> 01:10:04,325 Come on, we gotta go right now! 891 01:10:06,661 --> 01:10:08,496 Jesus Christ. 892 01:10:08,580 --> 01:10:09,789 Don't have a heart attack. 893 01:10:11,416 --> 01:10:14,085 Or do, you know? You want out of my life so bad, 894 01:10:14,169 --> 01:10:15,587 it might just be a nice shortcut. 895 01:10:15,670 --> 01:10:17,505 Petey, what the fuck? Why didn't you answer the door? 896 01:10:17,589 --> 01:10:19,299 Why do you care? Why would you even have a kid 897 01:10:19,382 --> 01:10:21,384 if all you're gonna do is just keep yourself away from me? 898 01:10:21,467 --> 01:10:23,052 I didn't exactly know what I was doing, all right? 899 01:10:23,136 --> 01:10:25,263 I was just a stupid, dumb kid. 900 01:10:25,346 --> 01:10:26,639 So I was an accident? Is that what you're saying? 901 01:10:26,723 --> 01:10:29,017 Everything is an accident, yes. 902 01:10:32,562 --> 01:10:34,063 Wow, nice one. 903 01:10:36,065 --> 01:10:37,066 Great to hear. 904 01:10:43,072 --> 01:10:44,782 I... That's not what I... 905 01:10:51,497 --> 01:10:53,541 Yes, it was an accident, Petey. 906 01:10:57,420 --> 01:10:58,713 But you are not a mistake. 907 01:11:02,967 --> 01:11:05,303 I'm so glad you're here with me. 908 01:11:07,305 --> 01:11:08,556 You're very precious to me. 909 01:11:11,851 --> 01:11:13,561 But that's why I stay away, because I... 910 01:11:14,312 --> 01:11:16,731 I come with all sorts of weird baggage, 911 01:11:16,814 --> 01:11:18,441 and I don't want you to have to deal with that. 912 01:11:18,524 --> 01:11:19,901 - Like what? - Like... 913 01:11:20,735 --> 01:11:22,570 Bad stuff, Petey, like... 914 01:11:24,155 --> 01:11:25,323 like evil stuff. 915 01:11:26,699 --> 01:11:29,244 Stuff I got from my dad, and I don't want to pass it on to you. 916 01:11:29,327 --> 01:11:30,954 What are you talking about? Like what? 917 01:11:31,037 --> 01:11:32,080 Like... 918 01:11:38,336 --> 01:11:39,337 Hold on. 919 01:11:41,005 --> 01:11:43,091 Open up, it's the motherfucking police! 920 01:11:44,384 --> 01:11:47,095 All right, all right. 921 01:11:48,263 --> 01:11:50,390 Shut up! Shut up and hands up! 922 01:11:50,473 --> 01:11:52,475 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Just relax, all right? 923 01:11:52,558 --> 01:11:54,018 - Sh, sh! - Just relax, relax. 924 01:11:54,102 --> 01:11:55,770 - Get the keys. - What? 925 01:11:55,853 --> 01:11:57,021 Okay, okay! 926 01:11:57,105 --> 01:11:58,940 Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. 927 01:11:59,023 --> 01:12:00,733 All right, all right. 928 01:12:03,111 --> 01:12:05,613 We're gonna go for a little drive, okay? 929 01:12:07,407 --> 01:12:08,574 Okay, all right. 930 01:12:32,265 --> 01:12:33,433 All right, stop here. 931 01:12:36,728 --> 01:12:37,812 Where are we? 932 01:12:38,980 --> 01:12:39,981 Huh? 933 01:12:40,064 --> 01:12:41,190 Where are we? 934 01:12:42,233 --> 01:12:43,484 That's your brother's house! 935 01:12:43,568 --> 01:12:45,153 Or his fortress. 936 01:12:45,945 --> 01:12:47,822 Don't pretend like you don't know where we are! 937 01:12:47,905 --> 01:12:49,157 I don't know, all right? 938 01:12:49,240 --> 01:12:51,492 We're, you know, we're estranged. 939 01:12:51,576 --> 01:12:54,203 - Ah, shit, man, that sucks. - Thanks. 940 01:12:54,287 --> 01:12:56,164 - Shut up! - Okay. 941 01:12:56,247 --> 01:12:58,833 You, you go inside, 942 01:12:58,916 --> 01:13:01,544 you make nice with your uncle, you get me the monkey. 943 01:13:01,627 --> 01:13:03,588 - And you bring it out, okay? - What monkey? 944 01:13:06,507 --> 01:13:08,343 It's... It's got a little red vest, 945 01:13:08,426 --> 01:13:10,219 and it holds a drum, and I need it. 946 01:13:10,303 --> 01:13:12,263 Why does this guy know about a monkey and I don't? 947 01:13:12,347 --> 01:13:14,098 He doesn't know about it and he's not going in there. 948 01:13:14,182 --> 01:13:15,183 It's a toy monkey? 949 01:13:15,266 --> 01:13:17,226 Don't call it that, all right? 950 01:13:17,310 --> 01:13:18,561 It's not. It's... 951 01:13:18,644 --> 01:13:19,645 It's evil. 952 01:13:20,271 --> 01:13:21,773 It's basically the devil, all right? 953 01:13:21,856 --> 01:13:23,107 It's a toy monkey. 954 01:13:23,191 --> 01:13:25,318 I was gonna tell you when you were older, okay? 955 01:13:25,401 --> 01:13:27,779 You've been a goddamn deadbeat dad because of a toy monkey? 956 01:13:27,862 --> 01:13:29,280 What the fuck? 957 01:13:29,364 --> 01:13:31,407 Hey, language, and yes, but that's why we have to get 958 01:13:31,491 --> 01:13:33,076 as far away from this place as possible. 959 01:13:33,159 --> 01:13:35,495 Seriously, kid, you gotta hope you get that goddamn monkey, 960 01:13:35,578 --> 01:13:36,996 because I'm gonna shoot this guy. 961 01:13:37,080 --> 01:13:39,582 All right, just let me go in there with him. 962 01:13:39,665 --> 01:13:40,833 - Please. - No! 963 01:13:42,251 --> 01:13:44,420 There is a doggy door around back, 964 01:13:44,504 --> 01:13:46,756 and your kid better hope that he's scrawny enough to fit. 965 01:13:47,465 --> 01:13:49,300 You don't call the cops or do anything. 966 01:13:49,384 --> 01:13:51,219 You get in there, you get me the monkey, 967 01:13:51,803 --> 01:13:54,097 or I swear I'm gonna shoot you both, like, a lot of times. 968 01:13:54,180 --> 01:13:55,473 He's not going in there. 969 01:13:55,556 --> 01:13:57,642 - Shut up! - All right. 970 01:13:57,725 --> 01:13:58,726 Go. 971 01:13:59,936 --> 01:14:01,187 Hal... 972 01:14:01,270 --> 01:14:03,064 this is some fucked up shit. 973 01:14:03,648 --> 01:14:04,649 I know. 974 01:14:07,110 --> 01:14:08,486 So whatever you do, 975 01:14:08,569 --> 01:14:10,488 don't turn the key in the monkey's back. 976 01:14:13,950 --> 01:14:15,326 Okay, okay! 977 01:14:37,974 --> 01:14:39,142 Fuck... 978 01:15:15,136 --> 01:15:16,137 Fuck. 979 01:15:33,696 --> 01:15:34,697 Huh. 980 01:15:36,115 --> 01:15:38,409 Kinda cool... I guess. 981 01:16:08,356 --> 01:16:09,857 You're not really a cop, are you? 982 01:16:10,942 --> 01:16:12,735 Shut up! Of course not. 983 01:16:13,569 --> 01:16:14,820 I hate cops. 984 01:16:15,655 --> 01:16:16,989 My dad was a cop. 985 01:16:18,199 --> 01:16:20,201 Still is, for all I know. 986 01:16:20,952 --> 01:16:22,787 You know, my mum said he was out chasing pussy, 987 01:16:22,870 --> 01:16:24,789 but I'm all like, there's pussy here in town, you know? 988 01:16:24,872 --> 01:16:26,207 - Yeah, I know. - But whatever. 989 01:16:26,707 --> 01:16:27,708 He left. 990 01:16:28,334 --> 01:16:29,627 And that's why I hate cops. 991 01:16:30,169 --> 01:16:31,295 But also they're cops, you know? 992 01:16:31,379 --> 01:16:33,089 Which is the best reason to hate cops. 993 01:16:33,172 --> 01:16:34,257 What the fuck? 994 01:16:37,176 --> 01:16:38,511 Uh... 995 01:16:42,014 --> 01:16:44,433 What the hell is that doing there? 996 01:16:46,269 --> 01:16:47,645 Hit it with your brights. 997 01:16:48,437 --> 01:16:50,606 Hit it with my brights, okay. 998 01:16:52,525 --> 01:16:54,402 Oh, gross! Shut it off! 999 01:16:54,485 --> 01:16:55,778 - Okay! - Shut it off! 1000 01:16:55,861 --> 01:16:57,280 I'm shutting it off. Jesus! 1001 01:16:57,780 --> 01:16:58,948 In your infinite wisdom, 1002 01:16:59,031 --> 01:17:00,700 I trust your flaming sword of righteousness 1003 01:17:01,367 --> 01:17:05,496 will cut the foul air and strike the right person 1004 01:17:05,580 --> 01:17:08,708 and only the right person. 1005 01:17:08,791 --> 01:17:10,001 Uncle Bill? 1006 01:17:12,795 --> 01:17:13,796 Petey. 1007 01:17:15,089 --> 01:17:16,340 What a nice surprise. 1008 01:17:17,717 --> 01:17:19,343 - You okay? - Who, me? 1009 01:17:20,136 --> 01:17:21,137 Yeah. 1010 01:17:21,929 --> 01:17:22,930 You. 1011 01:17:24,599 --> 01:17:26,851 It's been a long time since anyone's asked me that. 1012 01:17:28,603 --> 01:17:30,146 Now that you mention it... 1013 01:17:31,772 --> 01:17:32,773 No. 1014 01:17:34,191 --> 01:17:35,318 I'm not okay. 1015 01:17:41,324 --> 01:17:43,242 This was my favourite toy from childhood. 1016 01:17:45,536 --> 01:17:47,913 It's supposed to play the drums, but I think it's stuck. 1017 01:17:50,291 --> 01:17:51,709 Could you fix it for me? 1018 01:17:56,631 --> 01:17:58,132 It was your grandfather's, you know. 1019 01:17:58,966 --> 01:18:00,926 He brought it home from one of his trips. 1020 01:18:01,844 --> 01:18:02,887 He was a pilot. 1021 01:18:03,763 --> 01:18:04,972 He was a Petey too. 1022 01:18:06,849 --> 01:18:08,017 Did you know that? 1023 01:18:08,809 --> 01:18:11,187 - Hal never tells me anything. - No, of course, he doesn't. 1024 01:18:12,521 --> 01:18:14,148 So this is it then, huh? 1025 01:18:15,107 --> 01:18:16,525 The thing that messed everyone up? 1026 01:18:17,276 --> 01:18:18,361 How could it? 1027 01:18:20,112 --> 01:18:21,280 It's just a toy. 1028 01:18:23,115 --> 01:18:24,825 Why don't you try turning it, hmm? 1029 01:18:26,577 --> 01:18:27,912 Probably just needs a different touch. 1030 01:18:30,122 --> 01:18:31,123 There. 1031 01:18:31,916 --> 01:18:34,543 Turning the key is just simply something 1032 01:18:34,627 --> 01:18:37,755 the Shelborn men have been doing for generations. 1033 01:18:37,838 --> 01:18:40,633 It's a... A tradition, if you will. 1034 01:18:42,885 --> 01:18:46,722 But if it's not for you, then it's not for you. 1035 01:18:49,558 --> 01:18:50,810 What does it do? 1036 01:18:52,061 --> 01:18:53,229 Turn the key. 1037 01:18:54,271 --> 01:18:55,773 See what happens. 1038 01:19:45,948 --> 01:19:47,199 You want me to back up? 1039 01:19:47,283 --> 01:19:48,909 No! Don't fucking move. 1040 01:19:48,993 --> 01:19:50,244 Hey, okay. Okay. 1041 01:19:50,911 --> 01:19:52,079 Is it working? 1042 01:19:58,919 --> 01:20:00,588 Man, this stupid cop hat! 1043 01:20:01,213 --> 01:20:02,339 It's crazy itchy. 1044 01:20:03,132 --> 01:20:04,300 What? 1045 01:20:06,844 --> 01:20:08,345 Jesus fucking Christ! 1046 01:20:11,515 --> 01:20:13,058 Let's be careful with that pistol, huh? 1047 01:20:14,351 --> 01:20:15,352 Yeah. 1048 01:20:16,145 --> 01:20:17,563 - Totally. - Yeah. Right. 1049 01:20:17,646 --> 01:20:18,647 Fuck. 1050 01:20:42,880 --> 01:20:44,006 Uh... 1051 01:20:54,475 --> 01:20:55,851 Holy shit! 1052 01:20:58,646 --> 01:21:00,189 - Shit! Shit! - Oh! 1053 01:21:02,399 --> 01:21:03,776 Jesus Christ! Fuck! 1054 01:21:03,859 --> 01:21:05,528 Fuck! Jesus! 1055 01:21:15,579 --> 01:21:16,580 Fuck! 1056 01:21:23,462 --> 01:21:24,588 What the fuck?! 1057 01:21:29,593 --> 01:21:30,803 Fuck. 1058 01:21:37,059 --> 01:21:38,352 - Dad! - Petey! 1059 01:21:38,936 --> 01:21:39,937 Turn it again. 1060 01:21:40,020 --> 01:21:41,397 Turn the goddamn key right now! 1061 01:21:41,480 --> 01:21:42,481 What? No! 1062 01:21:43,190 --> 01:21:45,276 Then give me the fucking monkey! 1063 01:21:47,027 --> 01:21:48,028 That's it! 1064 01:21:48,112 --> 01:21:49,780 I'm not asking nicely anymore. 1065 01:21:49,864 --> 01:21:51,532 Do it. Kill him. 1066 01:21:51,615 --> 01:21:54,243 Kill my dumb shit brother, and do it now! 1067 01:21:56,412 --> 01:21:58,664 God... damn you! 1068 01:21:58,747 --> 01:22:01,166 Strike the goddamn drum! 1069 01:22:01,250 --> 01:22:03,419 God-fucking... 1070 01:22:03,502 --> 01:22:04,962 I command you! 1071 01:22:06,839 --> 01:22:07,840 Fuck. 1072 01:22:14,513 --> 01:22:16,599 Godd... Will you, please? 1073 01:22:18,601 --> 01:22:20,185 Goddamn it! 1074 01:22:21,353 --> 01:22:22,730 Godd... 1075 01:22:22,813 --> 01:22:24,732 How are you so goddamn strong? 1076 01:22:34,283 --> 01:22:35,326 Hey! 1077 01:22:35,409 --> 01:22:36,952 Huh? Petey! 1078 01:22:37,036 --> 01:22:38,287 Oh, Jesus Christ! 1079 01:22:38,370 --> 01:22:39,747 Ah, thank God. Come on. 1080 01:22:41,624 --> 01:22:43,667 God... damn it! 1081 01:23:24,249 --> 01:23:25,834 What did I do wrong? 1082 01:23:34,802 --> 01:23:36,512 What is that? 1083 01:23:58,075 --> 01:23:59,785 Jesus Christ! 1084 01:24:02,204 --> 01:24:03,580 Ah! Godd...! 1085 01:24:12,506 --> 01:24:13,590 What the... 1086 01:24:14,091 --> 01:24:15,092 Bill. 1087 01:24:18,220 --> 01:24:20,764 Fuck. The drumstick's still up, Petey. 1088 01:24:20,848 --> 01:24:21,849 Hello, dumbshit. 1089 01:24:23,017 --> 01:24:25,185 That's all you can say at a time like this, you fucker?! 1090 01:24:25,269 --> 01:24:26,520 Dumbshit's what you are. 1091 01:24:27,271 --> 01:24:29,106 Fuck... You fuck! 1092 01:24:35,571 --> 01:24:36,905 Jesus Christ, Bill. 1093 01:24:39,241 --> 01:24:41,201 You were really trying to kill me, weren't you? 1094 01:24:42,619 --> 01:24:43,829 Of course I was. 1095 01:24:43,912 --> 01:24:45,873 That's what all this carnage was for, huh? 1096 01:24:45,956 --> 01:24:47,207 You could've killed Petey! 1097 01:24:47,291 --> 01:24:48,667 You could've killed my fucking son! 1098 01:24:48,751 --> 01:24:50,085 For what? Why? 1099 01:24:52,296 --> 01:24:53,672 'Cause you killed my mum. 1100 01:25:03,557 --> 01:25:05,309 And I know you wanted to kill me. 1101 01:25:07,227 --> 01:25:09,980 But the goddamn thing doesn't take requests, obviously. 1102 01:25:15,194 --> 01:25:18,363 I've been turning the key with you in mind for days. 1103 01:25:19,114 --> 01:25:20,115 Nothing. 1104 01:25:29,625 --> 01:25:30,751 Listen, Bill. 1105 01:25:34,004 --> 01:25:35,214 It's not my fault. 1106 01:25:38,050 --> 01:25:39,802 It wasn't anybody's fault. 1107 01:25:42,012 --> 01:25:44,139 None of us deserved what happened to us. 1108 01:25:46,391 --> 01:25:48,352 We just happened to be there when it did. 1109 01:25:50,062 --> 01:25:51,063 Mummy? 1110 01:25:55,943 --> 01:25:57,152 I'm sorry, Bill. 1111 01:26:00,072 --> 01:26:02,157 But I guess I gotta go now. 1112 01:26:03,033 --> 01:26:05,744 Everybody dies, and that's life. 1113 01:26:10,290 --> 01:26:11,750 I'm sorry your mum died. 1114 01:26:14,461 --> 01:26:15,712 It fucking sucks. 1115 01:26:17,798 --> 01:26:19,133 I know how you feel. 1116 01:26:21,927 --> 01:26:23,428 She was my mum, too. 1117 01:26:27,558 --> 01:26:28,684 Oh, yeah. 1118 01:26:31,228 --> 01:26:32,437 I guess she was. 1119 01:26:34,857 --> 01:26:36,525 Never thought about it like that. 1120 01:26:39,027 --> 01:26:40,904 Innocent mistake, I guess. 1121 01:26:40,988 --> 01:26:42,030 Sure. 1122 01:26:42,698 --> 01:26:44,116 Makes sense, though, you know. 1123 01:26:45,617 --> 01:26:47,119 We're brothers. 1124 01:26:48,704 --> 01:26:49,746 Twins. 1125 01:26:49,830 --> 01:26:50,831 Right. 1126 01:26:56,211 --> 01:26:57,296 I'm sorry. 1127 01:27:01,008 --> 01:27:03,177 I wish we could have been there for each other 1128 01:27:03,260 --> 01:27:04,386 when we were kids. 1129 01:27:06,513 --> 01:27:07,681 But we're here now. 1130 01:27:10,767 --> 01:27:12,019 What do you say, Bill? 1131 01:27:14,229 --> 01:27:15,314 Brothers again? 1132 01:27:20,944 --> 01:27:21,945 Sure. 1133 01:27:28,744 --> 01:27:29,828 Nah... 1134 01:27:38,337 --> 01:27:39,379 I'm sorry. 1135 01:27:49,890 --> 01:27:52,684 So what, you two are on some kind of road trip or something? 1136 01:27:53,352 --> 01:27:54,478 Yeah. 1137 01:27:55,354 --> 01:27:56,355 A kind of... 1138 01:27:56,980 --> 01:27:58,899 father-son road trip, right? 1139 01:28:00,525 --> 01:28:01,526 Cool. 1140 01:28:02,402 --> 01:28:03,904 I would like to have done that 1141 01:28:05,405 --> 01:28:06,823 with somebody at least once. 1142 01:28:07,491 --> 01:28:08,700 So come with us. 1143 01:28:20,837 --> 01:28:21,838 Jesus! 1144 01:28:35,560 --> 01:28:36,687 Fuck. 1145 01:29:03,630 --> 01:29:04,965 So Uncle Bill pretty much 1146 01:29:05,048 --> 01:29:07,217 wiped out half the town where you grew up, huh? 1147 01:29:09,428 --> 01:29:10,470 Yeah. 1148 01:29:14,808 --> 01:29:16,852 I mean, I get that everybody dies, 1149 01:29:16,935 --> 01:29:18,562 and that's life, but... 1150 01:29:18,645 --> 01:29:20,480 it's just, like, everybody dies, 1151 01:29:20,564 --> 01:29:22,149 you know, at the same time. 1152 01:29:28,739 --> 01:29:29,740 So, uh... 1153 01:29:30,782 --> 01:29:32,492 what do you want to do now? 1154 01:29:34,661 --> 01:29:37,748 I guess we gotta figure out what we're gonna do with the monkey. 1155 01:29:40,083 --> 01:29:41,376 We keep it close. 1156 01:29:42,794 --> 01:29:44,504 We accept that it's ours... 1157 01:29:45,922 --> 01:29:47,341 and we hold on tight. 1158 01:30:38,433 --> 01:30:40,310 Hey, I just got an idea of what we should do right now. 1159 01:30:43,605 --> 01:30:44,981 Let's go dancing. 1160 01:30:46,483 --> 01:30:47,943 - Dancing? - Yeah. 1161 01:30:48,026 --> 01:30:50,070 Like, with our bodies? 1162 01:30:50,153 --> 01:30:51,279 Where did that shit come from? 1163 01:30:54,282 --> 01:30:55,617 It comes from your grandmother. 1164 01:30:57,202 --> 01:30:58,370 From Lois. 1165 01:31:04,876 --> 01:31:05,877 Cool. 1166 01:31:08,088 --> 01:31:09,381 Yeah, it is cool. 1167 01:37:47,987 --> 01:37:49,656 Shit, man, that sucks.